We all get negative emotions. Some people say that we need them and can’t avoid it, others- that we must avoid them. Of course, we can use negative emotions to motivate, gain power and to help us communicate. If we can benefit from bad emotions and there is no other way, we should definitely learn how to use it wisely. But there is another side to bad emotions. It’s bad for your general health, the way you feel, makes you act irrationally and destroys relationships.
There are many bad emotions, but I have chosen few main ones out of all:
Resentment– an unpleasant and overpowering feeling. We get this emotion for two reasons: blaming others for our problems or expecting a lot from them. When you make others responsible for your problems, you will then feel hurt and angry if something goes wrong. Also, if you’ll always expect people to act the way you want them to and to always do as you wish, this emotion will never disappear. We all need to understand, that we are all responsible for our own mistakes, problems and actions, no one will ever be able to change it. Start expecting a little more from yourself, not just those around you. This will help you to forgive people for the mistakes they make.
Fear– is an often experienced emotion. There are things and times we need to be afraid of- when your life is in danger and/ or something is wrong with your health… But this doesn’t happen often and people still don’t seem to be able to avoid fear. Fear is paralysing and stops people from reaching their goals. Fear usually strikes due to lack of knowledge and competence. If a person is not good at something or doesn’t feel strong enough to do things, they will usually avoid it and will fear to go ahead. The only way to fight those fears is – to learn and gain required knowledge. Try to use this tip: get more knowledge, energy and become someone who can achieve anything, someone who is stronger than your fears. It will never bother you again.
Anger– it ruins friendly feelings, happiness and makes you feel bad in general. Anger is very bad for people’s health and you can often spot changes in your body if you are angry quite often. Anger can give us a visit for many reasons… You can be less angry if you learn how to think things through and understand that sometimes things can’t be the way you want them to be. You just need to learn to adapt to different situations. You have to also learn to control yourself and not to let the anger do control you.
Jealousy– it’s a very bad feeling, it makes you wish others bad luck just because they were lucky or achieved something. People experience this emotion, because they don’t know how to enjoy the happiness of others or they try to be better than them. Usually by trying to be better than others, means we are trying to do something to make the other person feel bad. If you want to get rid of this emotion, you have to learn how to be happy for other people’s achievements, happiness and by supporting them. Being better than others may sound like a good idea, but it isn’t. If you only compare yourself to other people, your self-worth is only based on that. This will make you to always lose in life, because you will always make yourself see people who can do better than you. You should only compare yourself to yesterdays you and you need to have an emotional fight, not with those around you, but with your flaws, fears and try to always become a better version of yourself.
Pity– an emotion, which by many people is thought to be a positive one. But they are wrong. By pitying ourselves we become weaker and the problems just keep getting bigger. The same thing happens when we pity other people… you create a helpline illusion, which makes their situation even worse. Pity only happens when there are problems, weaknesses or flaws. By pitying ourselves we only try and make ourselves feel better, but we don’t take action against a situation or a problem. Pity disappears if a person only concentrates on solving the problem, analysing a situation and/ or doing a lot of thinking.
The feeling of guilt is very similar to pity. You feel guilty when you make a mistake, can’t predict a certain outcome or can’t control a situation. Often people who expect too much from themselves feel guilty for many things in their life. Guilt is an emotion which make people feel- weak, powerless or depressed. It’s hard to achieve anything you if feel like this. First thing we all need to understand- no one is perfect and we all make mistakes. Second- learn from your mistakes and if possible try to fix it and do everything in your power to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Guilt shouldn’t be confused for remorse. Remorse is a positive emotion, which pushes a person to make an apology and to try to be a better person.
Irritated– is a negative emotion, which happens when someone can’t change the situation they are in. People can also become irritated due to people’s actions or simply not being happy with themselves. It doesn’t matter what makes us irritated, because that’s a clear sign of weakness. Weak, not because they are not strong or lack knowledge, weak because they can’t control themselves. Of course, we may not be able to control ourselves all the time, but it is possible to try and do it most of the time. Self-control is the best way to avoid becoming irritated at something or someone. When you start to feel irritated, stop for a minute, try to not let this emotion escape in to the outside world. Count to ten and when it passes, carry on with what you was doing.
Anxiety– is a feeling when a person feels anxious, is scared or nervous. Anxiety creates tension, which makes us feel horrible. The main reason for anxiety is fear. It could be a fear of certain events, loss, punishment, not knowing and many more. Many situations which cause anxiety are the ones we can’t change or don’t have control of. So in this case we need to learn to adapt to the situation and try and to do everything we can to stay calm.
Every bad emotion is experienced because of bad feelings caused by situations or people in our lives. If you want to avoid bad emotions, try and change the way you view things around you and try work on your feelings towards them.